Boy, do I have a story for YOU. I met someone from match.com, after talking to him for over a month. His profile was impressive, to say the least. He had a master's degree in counseling, was an established writer for a magazine, and trained in martial arts - a bonus for me, as I love martial arts. He seemed to be this innocent, kind "country boy," and all his credentials, I came to find, were legitimate.
Things were going seemingly well, until he started commenting on my hair, my clothes, and more. For the record, I always dressed like a tomboy, and only dressed to the nines when we'd go out for a night on the town. My dress code was sexy, but VERY stylish and classy. I would always get compliments from both genders. Apparently, he had a major insecurity issue, and would start to cut on my choice of dress, and would even go so far as to make it my fault if he ever got into a fight one day. I found out he had beaten up a few men that have looked at his girlfriends at the time. I couldn't believe a man in his 30s, a counselor, was acting like a high school unruly punk. Things got worse: He knew I had both female and male friends, all of whom I'd known for years. He started to complain about all of them, which I know now as him trying to isolate me. If this wasn't bad enough, I found out he was an extreme bigot, and began mouthing off atrocious words such as the "N" word in public places!
When I confronted him on this disgusting behavior, he would outright stand his ground, and say "There is nothing wrong with it." He also claimed on his profile he lived a clean life. In fact, his field was specifically in alcohol and drug counseling. I found out he did all kinds of drugs, and was tripping on acid when he first wrote me! He did pot, mushrooms, acid and especially loved coke. Needless to say, I dumped him after only a few months. What makes me sick is that this person is a counselor, and boasts about his profound skills in the field. My dumping him angered him so much, that he left 45 messages in 72 hours on my answering machine. He was threatening my family, my friends, and even telling my mother to get cancer, suffer and die. He told me the same thing. He also told me to just do the world a favor and go kill myself. This "thing" is a counselor. Did I mention that? Oh yes. Sickening that these types are in those fields, and we wonder why people go to therapy and come out worse half of the time. I filed a police report against him for harassment, and recorded all the messages onto disk. Of course, he kept trying to call me, write me, and even called each family member of mine to get them on his side. What is sick is that he had the audacity to send me an email, telling me to read "The Sociopath Next Door" for ME! Not for him--oh no! In his sick mind, he is A-OK, and we are all the messed up ones.
My mother was flabbergasted by this. I am still in shock that he exists on the planet freely, and a degree in counseling to boot. I had thought about sending in the audio disk to the State Board, and his license would be ripped from his hands in a second. However, I worry of my safety if I do such. The moral of the story is: no matter how good even the credentials turn out, the person can still be a psycho. Do not jump into things like moving with the person, etc. Just keep dating as long as you can, and keep your distance. He wanted me to move in with him ASAP, which I was alarmed by. My gut told me no, and I am so glad I didn't. I later found a past girlfriend whom he had lived with, filed an assault charge on him. Apparently, he got it expunged so he could still get his license...to be a jerk.